Respite Care

Ok, this is my third blog today, and I have one more planned-maybe I should combine blogs??? who knows.  So at our first class and our last class we talked a little about respite care. Both times our Foster Mom/Teacher said she has never put her kids in "official" respite care, but has relied on other family friends or foster friends to watch her kidos if needed.  Her reasoning is quite valid actually. You wouldn't leave your kids with just anyone-would you? Usually you dont know the foster family that cssw chose for respite. Ok so this is all well and good, but that totally makes me feel like an a hole for figuring out how respite will work for us since I will probably be using more than the 7 days allowed through the state.  I am not changing my out of country plans just because we are placed with a child (or 2). Call me cruel call me mean call me whatever.  I know you would normally not plan to be out of the country around the time your child is born, but it is a little different when you don't know when that child will be coming to live in your home.  I do feel like a horrible person for having to say that I need respite for 8ish maybe 9 days so I can go to Aruba with the fam.  Our cw already knows that we will need respite, but everything I have heard from foster parents is pretty much respite is a frowned upon thing. I dunno. It will most likely have been to short a time (1-2ish months) so I also don't want to throw them back into the trauma of someone else leaving them even though I really am not. I already know that I will be calling them daily to check up and remind them of our love for them.  And I feel awful asking our friends if they would be willing to watch or new f2a kiddo for 8ish days.  I mean that is something any parent would have a super hard time with I would think.